Safety by Faith Christiansen
I can’t believe I let go of you. I dreamt.
L a s t n i g h t
We sat n e xt to each other. Warmth on my skin and down my
S
P
I
N
E
A loving g
a
z e Your kiss on my head pulling me closer. Sinking into your human form like nothing would -
Play.
Your burning brown irises through my rear view mirror. The sun bouncing and swiveling off of your goddamn Nissan Altima.
I s w erved to the
left trying to escape from your car on the narrow highway with
not enough lanes not enough horsepower in my engine not enough cars to hide mine from your goddamn Nissan Alt-
Pause
It’s amazing how quickly love turns into - How long has it been? 1 year and 7 months?
Play.
Your carefully measured voice on the phone f bombs and f you’s and You want a stalker? I’ll s h o w YOU a stalker.
Your goddamn Nissan Alt-
Pause. r e w i n d
The love language quizzes and the pumpkins and the pet names we’d recycled until we forgot our real names and never spoke them because it didn’t matter.
r e w i n d ( further back this time... all the way to the beginning)
We met surrounded by hospital gowns and ice chips covered with whispers too late at night. And ripped UNO cards and firesome lights projecting the acts of love? (onto the wall)
Fast forward (just a little)
The smoked we blunts and the cried we laughs and the yelled we fights and the decorations we scattered throughout our home. The weak walls not able to withstand your fists punching through them and the band aids (I even bought the brand ones) that I used to c o v e r up those late nights,
R
A
I N
Y days, and sober afternoons. I covered up those injured hands of yours. My artwork covering up holes in the walls from your fists. Band aids and artwork and concealer to cover those -
Play.
What’s happened, your honor, has been going on too long and I need your help.
(Thank God for that box of
i ssue T S by the witness stand)
Pause. r e w i n d
The half frozen lake from the leasing office window. Smiling with tears in our eyes as we signed up to move into another home together.
Fast forward (a lot)
R
A white c a
n
e alone on that lake now. Taking my name off the lease. What
happened
How did we get like this?
Play.
5 years of protection.
Thank you, your honor.
Thank you .
Pause.
How did 1 year and 7 months of loving you
turn into 5 years of legal protection from you?
Play.
Faith Christiansen is a singer/songwriter based in Columbus, Ohio. Catch her work at local farmers markets, coffee shops, and dive bars. Faith is a poet and she enjoys creating short pieces exploring letter placement on the page and intentional use of spacing within her work. Check out her work on IG @christiansenf1 and keep an eye out for her website coming soon.
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